This picture was taken somewehere around the year 2007, for a friend that doing one reality tv game show; that havent or wont be aired now. The causes remain a mystery to all.
That is not the point of the entry.
This picture remind me of the genuine happiness in me; having not to worry about anything; except for finding ways to gain more money for my shopping crave.My priority of life have changes many times during certain phases.
After SPM, the happiest moments are with friends and families; even with a low part-time pharmacy staff wages that offers only a quater of what I am getting now regardless of responsibilities that are yet to come.
During my years in Uni, the satisfaction of stirring knowledge to sink in and also achievements on passing subjects with or without flying colours. Only regret that I was suffocated by a love-life drama that may lead to down slide during the first few years; that I now realize it was part of the adventures.
I had an interesting start of having a few of jobs as it was during that time I learned the true meaning of the terms racist and office politics. It all came down to my own understanding to be as transparent as I can be not wanting to be despise or despising any.
It set me back a few times, as my life now evolving around people that I have known long before the huge responsibilities sink in, how we have grown up and matured; if any. I cant say that I already have everything that I want; looking back what I have now is certainly more than I have before.
After all that I have been through; after all the down turn that happen in my life and now that I am okay if not more; why do I feel empty? But yet again what is happy for me?
To be happy is being able to smile genuinely without any obligation.
To be happy is to live life with enthusiasm and hopes that wont fade
To be happy is when we had everything but yet nothing are being resent.
To be happy is to have it all; in our own definition of life.
But then again what makes me happy? Is it
A. More money?
B. Being thin?
C. having my dream job?
D. All of the above?
Maybe I need time for muhasabah.
Yeah, I need that.